IM TIRED OF LOVING THEM WHO DO NOT LOVE BACK

          Love is deep affection or personal attachment to a beloved person rather it be a parent, child, relative, and friend etc. I express love like how the ocean flows but in return I don't get love back. I'm constantly expressing love and kindness to them that I love the most but in return I receive silence. Love and Happiness is so hard to achieve but they are two things that don't need money to obtain it. Love and Happiness is free but only real if it is from within. 

          I refuse to think Love doesn't exist because I know it do exist. Why? Christ tells me so and so with that I know Love is apparent. My eyes see so much and my heart bares secrets of sadness. I cry for mercy and freedom from deep inside of this sorrow place in my heart. I am so strong to have come this far with much hollow for desire to be loved. There are two unconditional Loves in my life that I think of today that have always love me through good times and the bad. The two that I speak of is my Ultimate Father who is in Heaven and God Son Jesus Christ. The other Love that I lost and so dearly miss is my Mother who resides in Heaven. 

          My Mother Betty Ann loves me when no one else could have cared less. She felt my pain and understood my trials in life and showed me how to love when I don't get it back. I wonder today how did she do it and never showed much of emotion? I love her so much and all she did for me. She loves me and that makes me happy knowing that she cares and want the best for me. I often think about how happy I was to be around her it's like she had this spirit of love and kindness that no one could not resist. I wanted to be in her presence all the time when she was here. She was an amazing woman and I'm so proud to be her daughter and continue to be what she is which is Love. She loved her enemies as if they were her friends. Love is the key to conquer all things after all we are created from Love.

          I say all this today because someone hurt my feelings and that someone is close to me. As I sat here I could reminence all that my Mama told me Love Shelia Pray Shelia. I will do that and continue to do that but I believe in one thing that I learned years ago. We all can Love but if Love is not shown back then leave it along and show Love somewhere else. I'm speaking of anyone you care for. People that don't know me opinions of theirs doesn't bother me. I will pray for them. People that are close to me that is a different subject. I pray this day that I can understand or figure this situation out or move on. This sadness I feel today is not healthy and no one deserves to feel the way I do today. If your wondering what am I writing about well it is too much to explain but enough to talk about but embarrassing to address it. I want to say this If people think they are in control they take it for granted and do whatever the f....... she or he thinks they can do to you. Always remember to be you and never let another person put their feet in your shoes. Your shoes belong to you and you walk or take a step in your own shoes one at a time. I am a strong woman and been through a lot physically and mentally but I am human and we all have emotions. We heal by expression of what we feel emotionally no matter how tough the skin is we all cry.